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Thursday, April 29, 2010

How in the world....?

Am I going to explain to a potential landlord that not only are Mr. M and I expecting a baby in October, have a HUGE dog....but hey, by the way, I just got fired from my job and who the hell is going to hire a pregnant woman?

Not fun. Monday morning, I dragged ass to work, died all day long from playing catch-up, returning phone calls, emails, etc., trying to breath, coughing, and basically making sure my voice didn't get lost for good.

Monday afternoon I got fired. Yup. Apparently, a few clients complained about my attidude; I was told my attitude sucks, and that they were going to have to let me go.

Mr. M is really worried now. How are we going to make ends meet? I have a hearing with the unemployment office, and hopefully, because there is no previous record of me being told my attitude sucks, I will be able to get some unemployment until I find a JOB. That would really help.

Unfortunately, my Jeep payment costs a grand total of $450 a month. This does not include petrol, and it definitely does not include auto insurance. Add about $300/month for petrol, and the insurance is roughly $150/month.

We definitely can't afford the car on his salary. Unfortunately, we can't get rid of it, either...for A LOT of reasons.

I'm not sure if I have an attitude problem, either. I may have a temper, but I've never told a client that she's not my only client, and neither have I told a client that had he been at a hearing, he would have known what had happened.

Firing a pregnant woman who's already showing her 4 months of pregnancy is heartless. Plain, old, heartless. A self-touted "family-oriented" firm. Right. I should have kept my old job, and sucked up my sometimes-3-hour commute...regardless of whether or not I was miserable with said commute. We would have ultimately moved closer.

Right now, I hate myself. I hate the fact that I'm pregnant. I'm also still VERY sick. I keep Mr. M up at night with my incessant coughing. And to top it off, I wish that he didn't have to worry about making ends meet right now without even a little of my salary in savings - which was what we were doing...saving most of my salary, so that I could stay home for a while with Lentil.

Now, I seriously don't know what we're going to do about money. Mr. M is a teacher...obviously, his salary isn't that great. I am hoping against all hopes that I can get unemployment - at least until Lentil is born - if I can't find a job. In the past four days since I was fired, I've sent out at least thirty (30) resumes. I've responded to Craigslist postings. I've signed up at four (4) temp. agencies.

Honestly. Firing a pregnant woman with no warning or notice?

Friday, April 23, 2010

Bad Little Lentil

Ok, so Mr. M and I went from doctor to doctor today.

To make a long story short, I've been coughing my brains out this week. Last night, during one of my many wake-ups to go pee, cough my head off, and basically toss and turn in misery while Mr. M tried to make me a little bit more comfortable.

I felt this pain going from my pelvic bone to my belly button. And it was a searing, stabbing pain. Seriously. I freaked out.

I already have some sort of OCD in that I ALWAYS check the TP for any hint or sign of bleeding when I go pee. It's something I honestly can't help. At fourteen weeks into it, I'd be a total basket case should something happen.

Anyway, back to my story.

When I phoned the doctor's office this morning to ask them about the cramping and to ask if there is anything else I can take for the cramping, they said that I should call my primary care doctor about that - and they would phone me back about the cramping.

Got an appointment with the PCP. Point one for me.

The OB's office calls me back and simply said "The doctor would like you to come in for an ultrasound today".

This, my friends, scared the living shit out of me.

We made it to my PCP's office. I was told that I have a combination of a cold, really bad allergies and a viral infection. Nothing can be done.

Is it time to kill me yet?

We head down towards the OB's office, with a brief stop to grab a sammy at the diner in town.

Once there, the ultrasound technician was great. She immediately put us at ease, the first question out of her mouth was "are you guys finding out the sex?"

Awesome. I mean, great. I love it that she asked us this because the last thing we want is some rogue technician not paying attention to our wishes for Lentil's sex to be a surprise. Or...someone who just doesn't care or forgets.

Seriously, though...we loved the experience we got today.

And this is what we got:

Little Lentil apparently is lying down headfirst - smack on top of my cervix. Not only that, but I have a low lying placenta, which basically means that it's covering the cervix opening. The doctor's not worried about it, generally, it will grow higher and move up as I progress - should be at a good spot in about six weeks. Yay.

But....c'mone, Little Lentil! Get your head up off my cervix! It hurts!

Also, from the ultrasound screen, we could tell that we have a VERY, VERY active little one baking in my oven. I am secretly hoping that once I can feel the movements, Lentil's not kicking my ass!

Anyway...was a bit excited to share this bit of information. Mr. M hasn't let me lift a finger since I've been pretty sick. I'm tired of staying in bed. Poor Apollo, Mummie is sick, and he wants to be on the bed with me, but Daddy won't let him.

Goodbye, folks...just wanted to share the new Lentil pic, and how shitty I feel right now.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Sick, Sick Puppy

Ok guys. I'm sick as a dog. Sick, sick puppy. My lungs are on fire, and my nose feels as though it might explode - so does my head, for that matter. This morning, I woke up feeling as though someone took an ax to my head.

So I did what I know how to do best: I called my BFF and asked her what in the hell I could take. Mr. M and I had gone to get some soup for dinner, and I didn't have my Safe Meds List with me.

Off to the drugstore we go, while I'm still talking to Mrs. C. Mr. M picked out some generic-brand cold relief stuff I can take (per Mrs. C), while I'm on the phone with her still, and reading the ingredients of the generic version of Robitussin.

Fast forward.

Now we're home, I'm in my PJ's, and we're both on our laptops, curled up in bed. Mr. M was good and made me some chamomile tea with honey, since this damn cold is kicking my ass and I can't stop coughing.

I also just remembered there are so many things that would work wonders on this cold, if it weren't for the fact that I am trying to grow and bake a healthy little lentil inside of me.

I do happen to be of the school of thought that I felt a swift kick in my bladder the other day. Strong enough to make me almost pee myself. But not strong enough that I almost yelped. Haven't felt it since then, so it was probably just a gas pain or something.

Mr. M and I haven't had that much luck in finding a new home, either. What the hell? When we were looking last year, there were so many places to choose from, it was really hard to choose the [seemingly] best one.

We saw one that I absolutely loved - an old farmhouse, with the original mud room, the original built-in shelves all over the place, with a really big pantry. In the basement, it had an old old fireplace, with the built-in Dutch Oven. I frigging loved it. Mr. M noticed things I didn't, though - such as a leak in the roof, a patch of sinking roof on the outside, etc. Eh, that's why I keep him around - he's great at that stuff. I like crannies and the fact that I would have a washing machine and dryer.

Another place we looked at was kind of on the "eh" side. Not-so-nice area, quiet, but it seemed as though the entire neighbourhood is young and likes to party - not the best environment for a baby.

We'll look at a few other places this weekend.

Apollo is such a great dog when it comes to meeting people. He nuzzles their hand, licks them, and curls up on the floor if he's not sitting [protectively] next to me. Thank God, we haven't had a repeat of what happened to us last year when looking at places - Apollo got so freaked out by one place, that while we were in the basement, he stopped in his tracks, whimpered, looked at me, squatted and pooped.

So embarrassing. This was after we bragged for about an hour about how house-trained he was, and how he never has accidents inside the house.

Then, he poops. Go figure. Needless to say, we took that as an indicator of a not-so-good home and area.

So Mr. M and I decided that we're going to research into a foundation/organization to donate Little Lentil's cord blood to. For some reason, I keep getting calls and emails from one of the storage companies for this. It's SO annoying. Finally, they phoned me again this afternoon while I was en route to our meeting with a financial advisor.

Saleslady: Hi, this is such and such from such and such Company.

Me: Hi. How are you? How did you guys get my contact information?

Saleslady: Ma'am, we get contact info from third party vendors.

(this is where she REALLY pissed off this pregnant lady - with the "ma'am")

Me: I have asked you PLEASE stop contacting me, as my husband and I are NOT interested in storing the cord blood, and at this point, even if we were, we would NOT be utilizing your services. Please stop contacting me.

Saleslady: If I may ask, ma'am, why did you decide to store the cord blood?

Me: We decided to donate it for someone to actually use it. Now, lady, you're taking up my cell minutes. Please stop calling.


Seriously. Who the hell do these people think they are? As I was hanging up, I heard her saying something that was rather rude. Maybe I should have asked to speak to her supervisor...?

Anyway, since I feel like Death just woke up, there are no tummy pics today to post. Maybe tomorrow.

G'night ya'll.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Home Sweet Home

I'm really trying to concentrate over here. Really - I promise, I'm trying my hardest.

It's tough! Mr. M and I are going to start looking at places to move to in June when our 'lease' is up. That is, if we want to play nicey-nice, and go till then - if not...we're getting the hell out of dodge next month.

I actually looked at a place during my lunch-time was advertised nicely, and the landlord seemed nice enough. But for some reason, the neighbourhood gave me the creeps, and the place itself looked like it could easily turn into Section 8 housing. Just kind of depressing, that's all.

Big waste of my lunch-hour....

On the other hand, so far, I've managed to put a dent into our night schedule for this week - we're looking at two places tomorrow, and one place so far on Thursday.

Last night, we actually realized that we may want to buy right now. Prices are still really low, the interest rates haven't skyrocketed back to 10% (right now, at about 5.15% or so) and we might as well take advantage of it while it lasts. Now, if we can come up with the down payment, that would be the best, right?

In the meantime, though, we'll rent. It's not as big of a waste of money if you realize that we would rather buy into an area with good schools (I refuse to pay for private school while I pay high property taxes), and an area I wouldn't be nervous with my children playing outside alone. Actually, we're not even sure we want to stay where we are - state of country-wise.

Onto Little Lentil matters.

I really am beginning to like my tummy. (I think) I'm finally starting to look pregnant, instead of as though I ate too much mashed-potato-and-bacon pizza with beer from Bar in New Haven.

Oops. Now that's what I want for dinner.


Did I mention that I love Bar in New Haven? Well, I do. And I LOVE their mashed-potato-and-bacon pizza. Their freshly-brewed beer is pretty awesome, too. Great - I have something to look forward to when Little Lentil is born!

Have you ever experienced "UNSOLICITED ADVICE"???? I do. All the bloody time. The latest is from the girl who replaced me at my old law firm when I got laid off (she was hired for WAY cheaper...grrr...oh well - you get what you pay for). She's like 4 years younger than me, and has a 2 year old, used an American for her green card, and her English is atrocious. She says things to me like "it's a marvelous time to go through", or "your life is definitely going to change forever". Really? I totally didn't realize that from now on, I have to stop being selfish (hold on...I don't think the memo got to someone I know - must forward it), and someone else's needs will come before my own for the next 18 years (at least).

So I did the easiest thing I could think of - with regards to this stupid little girl who liked to give me dumb advice. I simply clicked on her FB profile, scrolled down a bit, and left-clicked on the little line that says "remove from friends".

Yes. I defriended someone over unsolicited advice. She was annoying. She wasn't even my FRIEND. She had me on her friends list since she had TONS of [stupid] questions to ask me when she took over my old job. Mind you - I had a NEW job myself, and she was constantly emailing me and calling me.

I wish I could post some more Little Lentil-in-the-tummy pics, but I think I'm going to have to enlist someone's help. Mr. M doesn't particularly possess photographic skills, and the last one he took, was horrid. So I am currently taking applications for anyone willing to take weekly photos of my ever-growing tummy.

Anywho. I do think I should get going, as I'm super-busy...just having trouble concentrating.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

It's Thursday

Yay for one more day left in my work week! And this will be a relatively long post, since I've been remiss in posting all week!

This week has been absolutely exhausting for me - I get home from work, and I type up some title search commitments for my old boss, who for masochistic reason, even though he can't afford my salary, still has the need to torture me by giving me some free-lance work.

But hey, I'm not complaining. A couple of extra bucks is a few extra bucks, no?

Asides from this, I do think that the lethal gas has possibly subsided a bit. In the past week, I have yet to sit in my car, making faces while the smell dissipates. I've noticed that I get some pretty weird expressions from on-lookers, while I bop away to my music with a funny look on my face - I think my face actually turns green.

On April Fools, we spread the news about the pregnancy via FB. I [mainly] wanted to see how many people thought I was joking. Nobody thought we were joking! I guess people know that I would never joke about such a thing. Good stuff.

Anyway. I cleared out my shelves tonight - by this, I mean I put my [tighter] winter shirts and sweaters, along with too-tight-pants that not even the Bella Band works with...all into one huge storage container.

Now, the shelves looks like this:

I have a deal with a fellow Bumpie that we'll both do our closets by Saturday morning. I have a lot of work ahead of me. This is what one half of my closet looks like:

Good thing the other half of the closet is actually organized. Although I can probably put away A LOT of stuff that won't fit me for a looong time to come.

Las Saturday, I made Mr. M go to BRU with me to do some registry stuff. Needless to say, we went a big trigger-happy. I still need to go through the print-out, and do more research. I bought Baby Bargains, and have been known to pull it out of my purse when I get bored. It's pretty good, actually. Very educational. But anyway...I THINK we decided on the stroller and carseat. More research needs to be done. I LOVE the Peg Perego Pliko. Mr. M thinks it's too much money. I told him that he's lucky I'm not asking for an Uppababy or Buggaboo. Those are awesome. The art of Strollering and Carseating has been mastered by those two.

By the way, people, in case you're wondering, we're not finding out the sex of Baby M. We want the can guess away with our Poll on here, but please don't try to tell us about the old wives' tails and whatnot due to the way I'm carrying, the small or large bump, my skin, how pretty I am, etc. I won't buy it, and if anything, it will put doubts in my mind as to the veracity of our decision to not find out the sex. For now, Little Lentil is just that - Little Lentil, and if you don't like that, call it Baby M.

Also, I've warned people that my blog is brutally honest. I got yelled at on Sunday morning by my mum at 9AM. She said that I need to watch my mouth, show respect for Baby M, and myself. The worst word I use is shit. Yes, I talk about sex. Only because I've been enjoying it so much - so much that I think pregnancy has turned me into a nympho. I must share the happy and nasty thoughts that cross my mind.

Think about it - how often will I be able to have an excuse for having no filter between my brain and my mouth? Not that often, trust me. Mr. M is all about keeping people happy and being diplomatic. EEEW.

Now...I'm tired. And I must pee again. Gnight.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Attention: Please read this one

Ok people.

I'm really upset right now - I have been for the past week. Maybe it's because I'm about to become a mother, or maybe it's the innate sense of fairness and justice that I still have in my somewhat young and innocent mind.

Phoebe Prince did not have to kill herself to prove a point. She did not have to hang herself so that some little bitches could get away with tormenting her not not only for a few days or weeks - but MONTHS on end.

My heart goes out to her family. I hope that someday, somehow, they receive the closure they will need to give them the strength to continue their daily lives after burying one of their children. That's got to be one of the hardest things to ever have to do. One should never have to bury their child. Seriously. I don't think I could do it.

Phoebe's parents *tried* to get school officials involved. To no avail. One of the bully's mother actually gave an interview saying "My daughter didn't do anything to cause this. They were just words, she never physically hurt her, and words don't hurt people, and this is how teenagers are". this lady on crack? She definitely doesn't deserve to be a parent, I'm very sorry. Her daughter's actions, in conjunction with others' words and actions, were the DIRECT CAUSE of a 15 year-old girl's suicide. Not accidental death. Not an ATTEMPT to commit suicide. Phoebe Prince succeeded in HANGING herself in her own closet just minutes after the latest episode of torment.

My heart also goes out to the individuals who witnessed this torment and could not - or would not - say a single word. "Why should I get involved", they probably asked themselves. Only after death, did they realize that they too had a hand in Phoebe's death.

I'm really proud of Mr. M. Today, as his English lesson, he spoke about bullying, its victims and what to do in case they saw an instance of this. He said he actually got a great response from his students on this subject.

What made this group of girls and two boys think that they had the right to continuously torment and harrass this girl? I feel bad for her - I've been in her shoes. New in a country, new in a school, away from old friends and family.

I've given this a lot of thought. I don't think that Phoebe should die in vain. Please, everyone and anyone who reads this article in my blog, try to put in your own two cents so that another child need not feel alone. Reach out to the children in your life, whether they be yours or other people's. Let people know that you care. Let them know that it's OK to report bullying. I know I am but just one small voice in the wilderness. So are you. And you. And you, and you. But together, we may be able to make a slight difference. I feel embarrassed to bring a child into a world that is cold and cruel - a world filled with children who think that they have the right to stalk, harrass, bully, torment ANYBODY else.

States must begin passing more stringent laws against bullying and harrassment. Our voices must be heard to make a difference.

What I plan on doing, is through this, if I get enough answers or emails on it, I will print it and send it with a letter to our Attorney General, local Congressperson and Senator.

Holy batman tummy!

Yes, I'm a total Baby Bump Attention Whore. I also came out of the closet on FB today. I couldn't help myself - it's April Fools, and I really wanted to see who believed me vs. who thought it was a prank!

Needless to say, so far...not a lot of posts yet...meh. Oh well. Tough cookies to everyone else. I'll also post weekly tummy pics for the above-stated reason.

I love this. I'm curled up in bed with Mr. M. Apollo Puppy is curled up on his little bed on the floor next to me. Mr. M's rubbing my back. I'm writing, and he's watching that Capitalism movie by Micheal Moore. This stuff kind of bores me - I mean, I deal with idiots throughout the day at work, and I listen to depressing news day in and day out...why perpetuate?

Anywaysss...I'm exhausted.